So how am I doing? It is probably important to stop regularly and ask that question. A little critical self analysis.
I am busy, but consistently crossing gotados off the list. Google is telling me gotados is not a word. It is short for things I got to do. I am far from caught up, but moving steadily.
I have started the process of signing up for retirement, a multi step process, I need to keep chipping away at.
Four people have told me, I am working too much, and I should chill before my head explodes. I am reminding myself, and others that I have limits, boundaries. Then I wake up early, log on to work early, then work late, I missed my treadmill-hour one day last week because work just kept coming in. Who schedules meetings for 9 AM or 4:30 PM?
For a couple of years, I reminded my sweet bear that he was not the saviour of the department he retired from, now he is reminding me of the same. We put a part of ourselves into our work. It matters, we believe in what we do, and why it is done. We worry about it, and sacrifice for it. But work is not a sensate being, it does not always return our love. Business is largely a matter of the numbers, and accounting has no heart.
I am breaking a couple of unwritten rules at the office, collaborating and sharing risk and reward with other departments. Increasingly each department is seen as a separate business, with its own budget, that lives and dies on it's own numbers. I keep encountering questions about a plan to split projects with another department. What if the return to the department is not exactly proportional to the effort. We could be making a profit that shows on someone else's ledger at the end of the day. We are all a part of the same whole. A rising tide floats all boats. I have grown weary of the numbers. I won't miss that part of the job. I hate that part of the job.
So how is my mood? Overstressed, obsessed.
I used to overstress and over obsess and over work. And is worth it? Yes, I take pride in my work and jobs I've had, but once, a good co-worker once said, "Give 100% and not an ounce more within our scheduled hours. Is it ever really appreciated? And if you do they take advantage." Now I heed that advice.
ReplyDeleteAnd I adore those rabbits!!!!!! Wherever did you get them or see them???
The bunnies are in a shop window on King Street.
DeleteWith regard to work, we are all just pegs filling holes. When we depart , there will be someone else there to fill the hole. None of us are indispensable.
ReplyDeleteSo true
DeleteAnd that too is a very good wise Point Yorkshire.
DeleteI wish you could let go a bit more. You don't want to suffer burnout in your last few months there. Just know you've done phenomenal work and have had great success. These final months don’t change that. Listen to J. I LOVE those rabbits. We must be able to find a metaphor in those two.
ReplyDeleteThe bunnies seemed to be engaged taking advice from one another.
DeleteTake it easy man and wind down to retirement. The last thing you want to do is retire with heaps of work matters on your mind.
ReplyDeleteI could start saying, your problem now.
DeleteThe end of the job is near, don't let it overwhelm you now.
ReplyDeletePass off some of those gotados to others.
I never have learned to delegate.
DeleteLove that photo of the rabbits. The glasses make them look intellectual somehow. Sorry to hear that work is becoming all-consuming.
ReplyDeleteAnd I almost left home without my glasses this morning.
DeleteI know that feeling. I had it when I retired from the banking industry. I find that my post retirement work isn't as stressful. I don't feel stressed by work any longer which is a good thing....I think.
ReplyDeleteI am getting closer to finding out.
DeleteI like that word, "gotados." Try and give your self some grace. I know it is hard to let go as I just retired, but start letting go. It will help when the final day does come.
ReplyDeleteA work in progress.
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