Greetings from the Board of Directors at Spo Reflections. We have seized this blog thingy for the day to express our demands.
Our minions need to spend more time rolling down gentle grassy slopes, or pillaging. One or the other, but do something diverting.
You all work too hard, and take things far to seriously. Laugh for a change, sing a silly song, listen to a tale that scares you. Emotions are meant to be let out, not bottled up, some of you haven't farted in years and it shows.
Speak up when outraged. Being polite gets you nowhere. Speak up, VOTE! If you don't lead change, some other pillager will.
Stop worrying about what you eat, and think more about what is eating you. We are not obsessed with what others think of us, and many people find us attractive because we are who we are, we are comfortable in our own skins, and a few animal pelts, and horns, don't forget to the horns.
You all have spent over two years hunkered down in your caves, get out and breath in the sea air. Feel the sun on your beard, the wind in your hair - at least what is left of it.
Find a friend, and tell racious stories, tall tales, lies if you can.
Do something that makes you smirk when someone asks, what are you up to and you say, "nooothing!"
Take 15 minutes this weekend to just be silly! Or we will come seize you by the bloggs and take you out for a night on the town you will always remember. Oh we shouldn't make promises like that, some of you would enjoy that.