Sunday, August 14, 2016

So How Are You?

My Sunday Five Questions for this week are about how are you?

1: When you ask how am I doing, do you want to hear only the positive, or the full answer?
2: So, how are you doing?
3: What is your greatest health fear?
4: How do you really feel about getting older?
5: Do you always tell the full story about how you are doing?

My Answers:

1: When you ask how am I doing, do you want to hear only the positive, or the full answer?

I want to hear what you are comfortable talking about.  We all need someone to listen to the full story, but we don't always want to share it.  When you start to tell the full answer, I will always try hard to listen. I want to hear as much as you want to tell.

2: So, how are you doing?

The question is often asked, so are you back to normal?  The real answer is, I am about as good as I am going to get, this is the new normal.  I will never have the body I had before.  I am okay with that, my recovery far exceeded expectations, but, there is permanent nerve damage.  When I move or sit there is pinching and pressure along my spine,  I feel my ribs in ways that are not normal, and always will.  Most nights I wake a couple of times and have to reposition to get comfortable.  For at least a few minutes everyday it hurts when I breath.  That is my new normal, I can live with it.  I am so fortunate, I was very close to losing movement in my legs permanently.  I manage without pain pills, because I choose to, I don't like the feelings of the pills.  It would help if I would lose more weight.  I will get back to working on that.

3: What is your greatest health fear?

Living too long.  I am looking for life in my years, not years in the life.  Seriously, I worry that the fix on my spine will cause expanding complications over time. Every new pain, or change in sensation makes me question how long the fix will last.

4: How do you really feel about getting older?

I rather like it, I am maturing, ripening like an apple in the October sun.  I know that aging brings with it changes.  I am determined to age with dignity and not fight or fake being anything other than an adult who has experienced a lot of adventure.

5: Do you always tell the full story about how you are doing?

No, I am usually polite, and say great, or "I am Feeling Much Better Now."


  1. 1) I prefer a positive bent. It really does depend on how well we know each other. The casual aquaintence should be courteous yet honest. The close friend should be flat out truthful.
    2) This morning? My left shoulder/bicep freakin hurts. I'm at that stage of recovery where I am just starting my daily exercises. I don't know what I did yesterday but this is scaring me how much it hurts at this moment as I haven't felt this much pain since about a week out (I'm going into week 6). Overall though I'm very happy with my recovery thus far and know that this pain will pass. It's Sunday so I'll give it a rest.
    3) My greatest health fear? Hmmmm, I always strive to make the best of what I have so I haven't really given thus much thought. The first thing that comes to mind would be loosing my sobriety and going back to the hell that is active alcoholism. Thus I'll be going to my meeting this morning as I do every Sunday.
    4) I rather enjoy getting older.
    5) I stay on the polite side. I'm that glass half full guy so unless things really suck, I'll be telling you I'm doing quite well or " I am feeling much better now." ...grin

  2. 1: I second fearsome beard; it depends on how friendly I am with the other person. I can do without constant whining from an acquaintance.

    2: today is a good day!

    3: not being able to do things for myself

    4: IT KICKS ASS! I'mma turning 62 in 3 weeks.

    5: see the answer to #1

  3. The question 'how are you doing?" is a troublesome statement for it seldom means a literal inquiry about another's welfare. Most of the time it is part of a customary salutation to get to the real conversation.
    1. I want to hear a brief reply yes or not really.
    2. another one that usually needs only a 'oh OK" response.
    3. growing dependent on others
    4. really now? mostly fear
    5. seldom if ever. People aren't usually wanting that sort of response.

  4. David,
    A question that is asked frequently of all of us, but most times the questioners doesn't really want to know, "how are you doing?" habit form of greeting. But since you asked here are my answers:

    1. I really want to know. Sometimes when one has a problem it lessens the discomfort to talk about tit and I am willing to listen to provide that comfort. I mean it when I ask "How are you doing?"
    2. So how am I doing? Very well thank you. I'm in a calm period medical wise. No mortgage and managing to keep up with the ever increasing costs of living on a fixed income, for now anyway. Very happy that I am in a relationship both at home and with my Canadian friend. I really do have the best of both worlds and yes I am bragging which I have a right to do at my age and I don't care what anyone thinks.
    3. My greatest health fear is being dependent on others. My worst fear is having a stroke that doesn't kill me and I'm just vegetable vegetating.
    4. How do I really feel about getting older? When I was young I feared it but now that I am older and having the best time of my life I love it! Oh except of course for the aches and pains when I get up on the morning but a good walk usually takes care of that stiffness.
    5. Do you always tell the full story of how you are doing? No, because most people aren't interested and I don't want to bore them.