If my mother were still alive, today would be her 92nd birthday. She lived to 89, a long a full life. She ventured a long way from home, as we all are, she was forever scared by her upbringing.
Five years ago, I stopped at a drug store the weekend before mother's day, to buy a card. One of the men standing there was grumbling about having to find a card, before I could stop myself, I said, "someday you won't have to do this anymore, this may be my last time."
Do I wish she was still alive, not really, and certainly not in the physical and mental condition she was in most of the last 3 years of her life. Her passing was a relief.
I am still examining my relationship with my mother. It was far more complex than I admitted when she was alive. But the past is gone. Time to be thankful and move forward.