Thursday, August 05, 2021

Thursday Ramble - Go Stack Some Stones


I had a bit of a melt down a week ago.  It was triggered by a simple email request from a colleague. My immediate response was grumpy, within 10 minutes I sent a follow up that I would fix it in the morning.  It revolved around IT issues. It brought on a torrent of viterol and sarcasm that woke me in the middle of the night and kept me awake. The next day, with calmer heads prevailing, I worked out a solution to an ongoing IT issues, by the time this posts there should be two new computers in my life.  A new(er) office laptop and a new additional  computer to use in my office that I simply bought.  I have reached the point in life that my comfort and happiness are worth more than a few extra dollars in the bank.  Working at home, with my personal computer and my office computer side by side for the past 17 months, I have grown accustomed to two computers, complete with two keyboards and two mouses (many years ago I asked what the plural of computer mouse was, a friend circulated the question, and the response came from Stanley Fish, who at the time was at Duke, that the plural should be mouses.) I will have two computers on my desk at the office for the rest of my working life.  

The bottom line of this was a realized how little it took to trigger the emergence of grumpy bunny.  I have noticed, as I mentioned last Saturday, that my writing has been down, merose, at times angry. I have written posts, read them and couldn't post them because they were so negative. Maybe this is another advantage of writing a lot, the tone of my writing reflects how I am feeling.  Bottom line, like millions, tens of millions, probably hundreds of millions of us, I am stressed out, maybe on the verge of burned out.  I am making decisions that will change that.  

I bumped into a neighbor coming home one day last week.  He is going back into the office one day a week.  I explained that I was back in the office three days a week - working from home I was finding the line between work and not work was blurred, I found myself responding to office emails at 6:30 in the morning and 9:30 at night and working all day in between. He said, "oh that is normal." I wanted to scream, no it isn't.  It isn't normal, it isn't healthy. Unless you are a surgeon on call to stop someone from bleeding to death, your work is not that important.  If he doesn't reply to an email until tomorrow, or next week, no one is going to die, millions of dollars are not going to be lost.  Yet, we treat our work as though every message carried that weight.  

The past 18 months have been difficult for all of us, and we are not sure if that light at the end of the tunnel is the dawn of a new day, or a freight train. People are concurrently craving human contact, and terrified by it.  

Step back, relax, put it all in perspective.  Work is not life, we live for more than work. Smartphones are killing us. Working us to death.  Keeping us from disconnecting from the world.  Turn it off, leave it on the desk and walk away.  It will still be there later.  

Go down by the railroad tracks and stack some stones.  Spend an hour concentrating on finding pretty rocks, stacking them so they are stable, making the stack tall, leaving it for others to wonder at. If stacking stones is not your thing, go find stones someone else has stacked, and admire them, post a photo of them.  

When the pandemic is over, we all need to get together for the world's largest group hug.  We need that. 

16 comments:

  1. I can attest to how you feel. Since being home and not dealing with people for over a year and a half, I now want to go back into my own world. I find that I'm very short, have no patience(like in traffic) and and quick tempered. I got very spoiled in quarantine. It will take me some time to adjust again, and must let things go in one ear and out the the other. I'm blond after all, I'm a wind tunnel!!!! I think Id rather go back into Wonderland

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    1. At only 29 (forever) you have many years to go until retirement.

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  2. Without even working for a living anymore, I can definitely relate. The job makes these times significantly more stressful. Your honesty with yourself and others is a positive. Wishing you a longer fuse, happier days (and nights) and, soon, a ginormous hug.

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  3. Anonymous8/05/2021

    Not having being an office worker, I don't really understand why work would bother you before you started work or after you finished work. Office workers are their own worst enemies because they do look at emails and take calls out of work hours.

    My former job was very important to people but there are many that are not.

    As of 8pm tonight, we entered COVID Lockdown number 6 with very heavy restrictions. Depressing and has upset plans but it is for the best.

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    1. Even for a very important job, there needs to be a balance with time off.

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  4. You've a right to be angry and annoyed and bothered and pissy and bitchy and mad. We all do. But then we also need to realize that cannot be our permanent mood and we need to learn to get over it.

    Your last three paragraphs are sage advice that we all should take.

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    1. Thanks, looking forward to a big blogger hug some day soon

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  5. I hugged a friend this morning for the first time in eighteen months. She's having a tough time and she needed it. I needed it. Recoiling from friends in case they might infect me has been the most horrible thing to do.
    It's been a thoroughly rotten time and we can forgive ourselves for the odd meltdown. It has however brought out the worst in some people in a way that is unforgivable and those people are now crossed off my Christmas card list.

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    1. We have family visiting for the first time in over a year, kind of a nice change.

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  6. During the past six days, I've gone from being a bit of a hermit to borderline agoraphobic with no hot water. I don't care, I'm still going to call them mice. Mouses sounds funny, but then again so would hice. I gotta fine some stones to stack and shove over.

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    1. Pushing them over is always an option.

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    2. Yeah, that would be very satisfying. I need to get smaller stones though.

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  7. I painted some stones; the newest is green and stacked out front.

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