I have an ongoing debate with myself, about being a people person, or not a people person. In many ways I am a loner, a soloist. Generally I prefer to work alone, I have had to work hard to not insist on doing things myself, that really others can do better than I can. Still I prefer to have my office door closed. I ran a help-hotline for a decade. I have answered the phone over 11,000 times and said, "Thank you for calling the helpline, my name is David, how can I help you?" I still cringe at the sound of a ringing phone. (To say I was burned out on that job is a massive understatement.) I generally avoid crowds, and when I am in them, I tend to navigate myself through them with efficiency, always looking for the path around the edge. (That has made social distancing a breeze.) I have a relatively small family, some of whom I would sooner avoid, so family time is not a big thing for me. There are some massive differences in political views in my family, I will never change their views, they will never change mine, we just simply avoid it.
I enjoy an intelligent conversation. I love listening to the adventures of people's lives. I like a good listener. But one or two people is enough, I loath herd meals, you know there 10 or 15 people go out to eat at once. The service is always dreadful, and I can only hear the person next to me or across the table, I feel left out of the laughter three people down the table. I much prefer going out to dinner (or breakfast or lunch) with just a couple of people, in someplace quiet where we can hear one another without shouting.
I can understand those who need a lot of interpersonal contact, and interaction. But that is just not me. It is not that I dislike people, I just enjoy time alone. I read a couple of books years ago on the difference between being alone and being lonely. At times in my life I have felt alone - felt out of sorts because of not having anyone around. More often I am simply alone, and happy.
Are you a people person?
Nope. I feel I'm more like how you described yourself.ReplyDelete
The two of you seem very happy in the house by the vineyards.Delete
You are a classic introvert. So am I. I think many bloggers are. If we were extroverts, we'd be out partying, not writing blog posts by ourselves on our computers, LOL!ReplyDelete
It is my day to write posts.Delete
I feel intimidated by crowds. I prefer the company of no more than 4-6 at a time. I'd rather have several close friends than a huge crowd of hangers-on. and most people suck anyway.ReplyDelete
You are a good judge of peopleDelete
I'm probably not and I suspect most bloggers are not.ReplyDelete
Hmm, maybe most of us have in common.Delete
Not a people person, but I would enjoy spending time with my former co-workers if they wouldn't always want to get together in huge groups for lunch. I so agree with your feelings about eating with a large number of people at the table. You only can talk with those on either side of you and the person across from you, and if those are the ones you really don't care for, oh, boy!ReplyDelete
At conferences, I have started making reservations and inviting one or two close friends to join me at someplace nice, my treat.Delete
I'm so not a people person that a few years back my granddaughters gave me a bone shaped beribboned plaque that reads "The more people I meet, the more I love my dog". Even they picked up on my Greta Garboness. It's a good thing that BH is an extrovert and enjoyable to be with in public. I tolerate it much better because of him, my hero .ReplyDelete
Sounds like a good balance between the two of you, the older I get, the more I like dogs. It is good to hear from you!Delete
I apologize for doing this ... you wrote "... I am a loaner, ..." ... no, Sweetie, you are a "loner" ... however, with the help hotline you worked you, indeed, did "loan" yourself out to others!ReplyDelete
I learned years ago [while still married] how to be alone and not be lonely! I had to when he was out on temporary transfer with the phone company! I've been on my own since 1990 and now I am 76 years old and ... honestly ... the quarantine time has not been difficult for me because it's just old hat for me! I can take or leave people ... LOL
THANKS, I need a good editor. Quarantine has worked well for me, the challenge has been venturing back out where there are people.Delete
"Hell is other people." -- SartreReplyDelete
It is a good think I am not people.Delete
I'm nothing if not inconsistent. I am sometimes a people person. Sometimes I want to hide from every last one. And I think I'm better than I used to be... at being around people.ReplyDelete
'people person": I define this by 'where do you go when you need charging?"ReplyDelete
If you get charged among others you are a 'people person' if you are an introvert and charge by being by yourself then that makes you not a a people person.