Thursday, November 14, 2019

Government Logic

I was working with a group of Federal employees, good dedicated public servants who have truly devoted their lives to helping others live a better life.  I was coordinating them speaking at a non-government conference.  

The Conference encourages speakers to bring their PowerPoint on a laptop they are familiar with. A series of emails with their fearless leader.  

  1. Our lap tops won't work unless they are logged onto our secure server, and we can't do that on public WiFi. 
    1. Then bring the PowerPoints on a jump drive, and use someone else's computer
  2. Our jump drives are encrypted and won't work except on another encrypted government computer. 
    1. Then email the PowerPoint to your home address and transfer it onto a personal jump drive
  3. We can't do that, it is a violation of security protocol for us to copy the file onto a jump drive that is not issued by the office. 
    1. Hmm, how do you normally do this? We email the file to someone outside of the agency.
  4. So, if they email it to me, it is not a violation of security protocol, (there is nothing confidential on the file) and I can do anything with the file.
    1. The solution, totally lose control of the file, to keep from violating the security rules.  
I wish I was kidding.  So many bright people trying so hard to do the right thing.  I sure am glad that file had nothing in it that is important.  


  1. Anonymous11/14/2019

    I guess a jump drive is a memory stick or USB stick. It all sounds quite absurd but probably the same here.

    1. Correct assumptions, yes likely as absurd

  2. I know nothing of which you speak. I am not tech savvy once so ever.

  3. Oh dear god. You have the patience of a saint.

    1. Her office funds 45% of my time, you can buy my patience, to a point.

  4. It's all pensionable time, as they say.