My father named me to settle his estate when he died, almost ten years ago. If I went back and read my blog posts from that time, it was a challenge. One family member was, and still is mad that I was named to settle things, despite the fact that I accounted for every dollar and declined a fee. A couple of banks and securities firms tossed up every obstacle they could think of. I moved the estate and my personal accounts from a brokerage in despair over the incompetence.
In the middle of this I was talking with a collaborator on a research project on the phone on day, and he simply asked "are you getting the help you need?" Without thinking, I answered "no- not really." I got up and closed my office door and took a few minutes to compose myself after that call. And then I addressed the issues. For me that was taking some personal time. Finding and reading books that helped support my mental health, grief and healing. Finding a couple of people to vent to. I had been so wrapped up in trying to resolve the issues, that I was not taking care of myself. We all need to do that.
From time to time, we need to ask, How am I really doing? Am I getting the help I really need? And go with how you feel. Seek out the things that you know will help you. If you know what you need to do to stay healthy and take care of yourself, allow yourself to do it. If you don't know, find the resources, reading, listening, counseling to find the help you need.
One of the biggest things that I needed, was someone to listen. Not to try to fix things, but to allow me to vent and verbalize my thoughts and feelings.
I need to remind myself to take care of myself, we probably all do.
These are challenging times, take care of yourself first.
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