There I am, looking every minute of my age, bearded because shaving is too much bother, grey because that is what happens if we live long enough, fat, a bit flabby, far from a model, more of a bad example of an aging man, and I think to myself, "who cares" as the short video from the young and beautiful guy, says, nobody cares.
Few people will notice, those that do will think what they want to think. They may think, does he know he is fat? Yes I do. Does he know he would look better with a better haircut and beard trim? Yes I do. But for the most part they will not notice or remember me. I am a person they see in passing.
If I am kind, if I say please and thank you, if I hold the door, and let the other person go first, helping in ways I can, they may remember that, but probably not me, not what I look like, or who I am or who I was. People remember the kindness, more than the person who was kind.
A good number of years ago (before I had my spine repaired and rebuilt) I fell in a subway station, a very kind person helped me to my feet, not an easy task, and walked with me to my car that was parked in the garage. I remember the kindness, but not the person. (I send out into the cosmos a very heartfelt THANK YOU to him.) I also remember that the station manager, 50 feet away sitting in a glass cubicle, didn't do anything to help. He hardly looked up, didn't ask if I needed help, didn't offer to call for help.
Don't worry about what you look like, or sound like. Be kind, people will remember your kindness.
To give him the benefit of the doubt, maybe the station manager didn't see what was happening? That's as charitable as I can be.
ReplyDeleteHe saw, and ignored. You are being king and giving him the benefit of the doubt.
DeleteTo be kind, considerate and helpful to others without expectation of thanks was in my upbringing. It rankles a bit when I hold open a door for someone who then barges past as if I'm invisible, usually younger people, better dressed than me. Becoming invisible happened soon after I turned fifty but occasionally has its advantages!
ReplyDeleteI have joked that my retirement job is "doorman."
DeletePeople DO remember kindness.
ReplyDeleteAnd it is a good thing to remember.
DeleteFirst off, I'd remember Pink Pringles in the park for a very long time.
ReplyDeleteAnd I agree that people remember the kindness, maybe not the face of the kind person, but the act; and perhaps because they remember they pass it on.
I often have people tell me they don't understand me; that I am sarcastic AF but also very kind and polite and they don't understand the combo.
I am going to have to come down there and buy you lunch someday.
DeleteYou're absolutely right! We posted on the same theme today! The last meme in my post says "Kindness makes you the most beautiful person in the world, no matter what you look like."
ReplyDeleteGreat minds think alike
DeleteFunny you post this. Yesterday a young man quickly entered the gym locker room and was in distress. Of the three others, two completely ignored him. I asked if he was ok. He nodded. But he wasn't. I asked if it was asthma, he nodded again. Said he'd be alright. I tossed on my shoes, headed to my car, got my inhaler and brought it back. He was grateful, but wasn't asking for help. The others - completely oblivious.
ReplyDeleteYou made a difference.
DeleteThis is great and very true! When I was in London in August I took the underground fewer times than usual because of all the stairs. When I did use the stairs, I'd rest a bit at the top or in the middle if it was especially tall. I remember a number of people who stopped to check on me and make sure I was alright. I don't remember their faces but I do remember their kindness.
ReplyDeleteWhen we were taking lots of local trains in France, I would carry my bag up, then run down and carry J's big bag up, one kind young lady carried his bag up one nasty flight of stairs.
DeleteThis is the second post on kindness I saw this morning as I saw Debra She Who Seeks post about kindness that she mentions in her comment above. I always have been kind and helpful whenever I can be. My parents were that way.
ReplyDeleteBy the way, I think you look great! All your selfies show a lovely, happy man living a fine life!
How we treat others can lead to others being kind.
Delete"No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted" ~ Aesop
ReplyDeleteOne of the blog administrators at "Travel Penguin" has been unkind to me. I wrote a brilliant comment only to discover, later on, that it had been deleted. I did not use any swear words or give bomb making instructions.
ReplyDelete